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2003-01-07 @ 12:33 p.m.
Seeing you so sincerely and deeply sad pained me in a way I have never experienced prior to that moment. To feel so helpless, so surrounded by a thousand questions I am incapable of answering, rendered me, quite simply, useless. The trembling tears falling from the beautiful blue landscape of your eyes stained the sweatshirt you gave me and created a void inside of my skin no sustenance could hope to fill. I wished with every fiber of my existence that I could seize the suffering and loss away from you and put it in a lock box on some deserted island where it would never need to be felt by someone so entirely pure like yourself. I couldn’t fight the tears building up in my own eyes. The sight, sound, taste, and feel of your tears brought me a sad compassion so large and unbearable, all I could do was cry there beside you. I cried because I know that you are hurting in a way you have never felt before, because he is your best friend and has been for eight long and sometimes awful years, because the look in your eyes and tone in your voice was one that said you finally understood why ‘life is fragile’ is occasionally the most cruel and dreadful truth. Most of all, I cried because I care. I knew that no word I could have uttered would have eased your mourning, so I settled for silent and allowed you to purge the anger and grief. I know that in your own time, going at your own pace, you will be all right. I also trust that deep within you, buried beneath all of the grief you are understandably experiencing, there lies the faith in fate and the belief that everything, even in grave and inexplicable instances such as this, happen with some logical reason. Older Entries |
