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she @
she

 

she wakes up with regret

holds her breath to forget

            loves all the lovers she has yet to have met

but the time between dusk and dawn

is filled with turning,

                        burning

                        yearning

            haunting screams she screamed when she was there

she’s desperate and depressed and the thumping of her fingers feels fake because she never knew if she meant it or not

she’s tangled in the tendencies

of loves she lost and there’s a tenderness in those tendencies that tends to

                        stop

her before she starts to start

            but

where she goes from here

has never been more important

than where she is.

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Older Entries
goodbye - 2005-08-09
- - 2005-03-31
happy birthday to me - 2005-02-06
toolong - 2004-06-10
- - 2003-08-12

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